Lovesick

It still throbs. 
My heart.
And boys from everywhere come
And they smile
And I see
Like you,
Them slowly give it all.

I dreamt I was buying my favourite record and crying
As if some how
My arms themselves longed to hold something other than, 
Musical beats
That I was dying.

I saw the world around me
Build and build 
And bloom into flowers
That spiralled headily.

This inside me
Wasn’t it beautiful
Though sad and missing
Growing and longing, 
How you make me strong. 
How I now know my value.

And inside my head, words retained, not to lose hope, 
For someday an end,
And something to note
Between the singers lines.

One note that turns and twists inside.